Barry Glazer

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[edit] Origin

Barry Glazer is the pseudonym used by famous Mob Boss/Hitman Paul Castellano’s second cousin Vincenzo. Vincenzo (a.k.a. Todd, a.k.a. Cenz-Box) has pure Sicilian blood coursing through his veins. He was raised on olive oil and laundered chicken cutlets, not to mention the Italian standard - Mozarell_ cheese.

Barry is known for his insane attention to detail, cleanliness, and strict principles. If you do not wash the dishes…he will make you dig your own grave.

Full of hair gel and attitude (10 lbs. in his hair and 10 lbs. in his Ralph Lauren Polo underpants, respectively), no one dares to cross this Staten Island Stallion. If one were to do so, they would not only piss OFF Barry, but piss ON him as well... and "trust me"...you don't wan't to do that!

Barry has been known to go by several different nicknames. Some of which include the following: Todd, Suit, Toddman Todd, BG (Barry Glazer for short), and Vanity. Dont forget about Yonkers Jim.

[edit] Common Terms

“fuhgetaboutit”, “no ones home”, "get real...let's be honest....cmon..........dude", "Hey Kayy", "Get used to it sweetheart" "well i appreciate that but..." "i can't, i have too much work" "i can't deal with you right now, please just go away Matt" "at 25 i want 500k in the bank"

[edit] Things Barry Hates

Rodents; Reptiles; Minorities (a.k.a. "animals" according to him); obscenities drawn on his beemer; Country; L-SATs; Double-dipping; Jake; Pony-boy; Misplaced tightie whities

[edit] Things Barry Likes

christmas; taxes; ferragameees; chocolate; being early; winter; eggplant parm; dignity; accounting; elsa; kpmg; the d-5 haircut; powerful people; money magazine; watches; the cleveland diet

[edit] Barry's Weapons

A/X apparel; windex; st.peter's shorts; inhaler; and of course the wiffle bat.

[edit] Remember when...

Barry peed his bookbag?

“Pasta Party”

Saturday December 01, 2007 (10:30pm – Barry can’t remember)

Barry started off the night active and unattractive, overindulging on the sweet nectar of his homeland’s grapes. According to FMB, Barry was engaging in “dormitory behavior” from the start. Due to his lack of interest in the male dominated sport of football, Barry pressured the rest of the crew to make an early appearance at one of his favorite guido techno hotspots, Murphy’s. Upon arrival, Barry met up with one of his acquaintances from Staten Island…it was going to be a long night. They pounded a few rounds of pineapple vodkas and fist pumped the night away in true Staten style. Discussion centered on material wealth and investments. Barry flaunted his imported Beemer, feragmee collection, and designer inhaler in many failed attempts at luring females back to his designer lair. After the bar closed, Barry stumbled his way back to Pinehurst road. Once back at the house, BG kept the party going strong by passing out on his bed fully clothed. After being confronted about being a puss, BG rallied back like a true Sicilian. He claimed that he did not pass out, he was only “guarding his room from the desperate housewives girl who was going to paste pictures all over his walls”. At this point, BG was done for, he managed to find his way downstairs and confronted several roommates. A mixture of minority slurs, curse words, and incoherent regional dialect poured from Barry’s mouth. 10 minutes later Barry was back in bed passed out with his designer shoes on. It was only the responsibility of his roommates to take further action. The weapon of choice: pasta. Approximately 2lbs. of this Italian delicacy were poured onto his bed, chair, and face. Barry, startled by the commotion, awoke to find that he was covered in farfalle and spaghetti. The next 20 minutes which ensued brought out BG’s true colors. Feeling as if the roommates had crossed the line and invaded his private space, Barry brought up the fact that he even let certain individuals copy his tax homework on occasion. How dare they copy tax and pour pasta on his bed. “You just don’t do it”. What will Barry do next???

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